Thursday, June 28, 2007

The Father, the Son and the...


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(Project Courtesy: S's school)

Before anyone thinks I am a diehard feminist, what with my food blog being “Bong Mom” and the other one called “Desi Momz”, let me do my father’s day post fast and fast means right now. Not that I don’t want to be a feminist but at this point of life I would rather steer clear from any of the “the isms” and expend my energy in something else.

Also before the men folks in my house who randomly skim through my blog and who might even kindly generate some revenue by clicking on the super exciting ads that I have entrusted google to put on my page get mad and leave huffing and puffing let me sing my paean to them. Since I am under pressure I am not going to say anything unpleasant about them, no nothing, zilch, nada…. It’s going to be all praises and goodness and this post is going to ooze sweetness as if I am an honeybee on a good will mission.

Sorting by first name, I would start with my Dad or Baba as I call him. He did a pretty good job as a Dad I think, one look at me and my blog and you would know. Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
But what I would really like to highlight is his role as a grandpa or “dadai” as the little one calls him. If there ever was an award for “Best Grandpa” he would win hands down. He does things for my little one that I would have never ever imagined he would or even could.

Next is the “other” dad, the hubby’s Dad. Now since you don’t know much about D you can’t really judge whether his Dad did a good job or not and you shouldn't believe whatever I say. But since this is supposed to be a “feel good post” let’s give the man his credits and leave the rest for D’s blog if he ever has one.

Now comes the in House Dad who can “make or break” it. Since he waits patiently while I click and edit my food photos and does not complain if he has to chew on stale sabzi while I save the exciting dish for next day so that I can get my coveted “day light” photos …I better say stuff which I would never admit verbally.

How good a Dad he is only S can say. What I see is how much he puts in to do his share of Fathering. The fact that he changed the smelly poo-poo diapers more times than I did, that he took turns to stay up at night to cradle a colicky baby, he took a week off from work to settle S in her daycare, that he takes care of S’s morning routine and drops her off at school , that he always spends part of his evenings with her playing or fighting whatever they choose -- proves that he had a major contribution in raising S to be the 3 year old that she is.

The fact that I cannot gloat in the glory that I alone toiled as a Mom while Dad was only at work is pretty bad by itself. That I can never tell S “You know your baba did not know to do the diapers” does nothing to boost my ego either.
It also makes me pretty boring because I cannot regale her and the crowd with stories like “Only once I had asked your Baba to feed you and instead of the formula he gave you Cinthol Talcum Powder instead”.

So S will never get to hear such entertaining stories and I will not get to be the all sacrificing filmy “ma” but she gets a great Dad and that’s a darn good thing, I say.


Leaving you all on this sweet note for a short break… see you all again next week with some Bengali Food posts.

Till then enjoy the pics.


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A month or so back a very close friend of ours (the only friend who knows this blog exists), packed their bags and left for India. They wanted to be close to their family, they said. They were happy leaving, but we were sad.For us, they were like family. On the last weekend with them we tried to drown our disappointment by doing what a true Bengali would have done in such circumstances...yes eating of course.







Lebanese food in the above place in Silver Spring, Maryland. My first experience in a Lebanese restaurant. Food was very refreshing but a bit too tart for my liking.



Gam bhulane ke liye (to drown our sorrows), we had these colourful liquids at a Thai Place nearby. Food was very good but the pics terrible so have nothing to show.

We miss you K, M and little M who ws the perfect sister for my S.

42 comments:

  1. All three Babas sound good to me.Men are different from,can't express freely except with daughters may be.Enjoy and accept however they are!:))
    Your hubby sounds like mine,silent but ok in dealing with family when he has to!!;P
    Have fun S! Lebanese food looks great there.I saw a Turkish restaurant here with a board "NO I.D.,No Hookah!:!!:D

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  2. Aww...what a lovely post Sandeepa...I love your term "In house Dad".....
    so what if Little S doesn't get those "quirky" stories, she obviously has a dad that cares a great deal. I was so pleasantly surprised at the things you mentioned about your hubby....What a guy!

    Have a lovely break, see you when you get back.
    -trupti

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  3. That was a lovely post...says so much about how lucky little S is...she doesn't need all the gossip when such a great dad is on hand...

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  4. I couldn't read the complete blog but did read about your friends. I know how it feels, one of my very very close friends is also planning to leave to India for good and it makes me very sad to hear that. I will come back to your blog, it is a nice one though.

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  5. Footprints was a cute project, definitely with a depth and if lil S did that one, then pls pass on my HUGS to her :)tell her this aunt always liked the ink-coated foot/hand prints like that one! On another note, I always felt a stabilized individual is brought up when there is a balance b'wn good mom & good dad element...If one is better than the other, then something is surely missing! D sounds like a good dad :)

    Shn

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  6. A great Dad is a wonderful thing! You guys are teaching the little one all about gender equality and the meaning of family, without saying a word, simply with your actions. Thanks for another wonderful post.
    Excited about the Bengali food that's coming soon!

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  7. Asha
    So you had a ID, did you try the "hookah" : ?

    Trupti
    Thanks and yes D likes doing stuff for his daughter. But inspite of that S is still a "Mommy's Girl". Isn't that funny ?

    Sunita
    Thanks :)

    Lata
    Yeah we tell them to come back again :)

    Shn
    S's teacher made them do that for Fathers Day. That was the kid's Fathers Day gift to Dads. Good now I have you all convinced and D happy and I can go back and resume my fights with him ;-)

    Nupur
    I have so many bengali food posts in my draft, but I don't get the time to post them. When i do get time, I go and post the newer recipes, which I try for the events :)

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  8. I too got a similar card from Jai for his dad on father's day. the words were so touchy and daddy was all in tears of joy.

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  9. Cinthol Talcum Powder ... never heard that one before!
    I didn't notice you had added ads to your blog! Must say they've integrated well with it.

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  10. that is a lovely post about Dads.
    Cinthol Talcum Powder that made me laugh. I am sure there are dads who did that, wonder why the mom chose to leave the Formula in the dressing table though or the other way around :)

    Sandeepa, you were in my neck of the woods! I like the falafel at the Labenese Taverna place but we usually visit one a little further north from where you went.

    I know it is kind of sad when friends pack up leave, had several that moved. But good for them sad for us! What do we do.

    Enjoy your vacation

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  11. great post my friend...enjoyed reading it...

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  12. You have a wonderful gift of writing. Love those choice of words that reveals yr heart. Have a fun vacation, My friend :)

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  13. Sandeepa, As always loved reading your post. I am not sure how good a dad will my hubby be but I am sure he will fare well. Dads are silent lovers and do get a lot of attention from the kids as well. Lebanese food looks yummy. Never tried one till date.

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  14. Sandeepa, I think I'm going to cry. What a sincere and sweet tribute to all those special folks -- you're the honey bee alright :)

    Have a great break!

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  15. wow nice way to put into words! which i can't get to! all the DADs are doing a great job.

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  16. What a nice post Sandeepa.Well,it is better that she has a good dad than you having to repeat the same old stories that dad gave her talcum powder instead of formula,don;t you think?Atleast I think so.:)Even the children will one day say,"Oh shut up mum!you embarass me"hee hee..But so glad to see that D is a great dad.All these things only leave me wishing things were different for me but no regrets anyway.A loves me so much and that makes my day:)(of course,so does V but..)Great tribute to all the dads.

    Lebanese food:never had it before.

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  17. As appeasements go, that was gooood!

    What a lovely poem. I was going to point you towards the poem on Winkie's Way in her Father' Day post, but just saw that you have commented there as well!

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  18. Lovely post, and an interesting write up... The footprints project was cute!! and btw, ur recipes are just great.....

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  19. A very Sweet post! D sounds like a nice Daddy. :)

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  20. he he he... ur posts r always fun to read san. all 3 babas sound really cool:) i am laughing so loudly sitting here in my office and again all my co-workers have that same strange looks on their face. well, they will get used to this pretty soon;)
    D really eats stale food? poor D ;) same with K here. now a days he starts to clean the kitchen as i will be busy with clicking.
    just cathching up with all my dear blogger buddies. i am buried to neck with office work n hope i should be able to resume my blogging pretty soon.

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  21. lovely post.... Very nice write up!

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  22. Hi Sandeepa,
    Thanks for checking on me. Just took a break for no reason. loved your post. S is lucky and so r u! And I have to add, me and my little one are lucky too:)

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  23. I have to try more Lebanese restaurants. I generally have liked what I have tasted so far.

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  24. I'm so looking forward to the coming posts! And your daughter is so lucky to have such a loving family--with great stories to tell!

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  25. Sandeepa, that was a wonderful post...Sorry to hear that your friends left.. I have been through the same...

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  26. Little S's got some great dads in her life... Nice write up as usual Sandeepa...
    And ouch on your best friends moving away... that must be sad... My best friend might be moving away soon too... So I can totally understand the feeling... :(

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  27. This was nice a nice writeup Sandeepa. How did I miss it? Enjoyed reading it. Viji

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  28. Sorry for being MIA!! :) Heh heh, am currently finishing up The Namesake and also can't help but notice the repeated references to Bongs and food.. :)

    The Lebanese food looks great, was that tuna or some other fish on the left side of the plate? yummm... am on a break, too, and am enjoying it, although I'm starting to feel fidgety already and missing work, heh heh

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  29. Hi, Sandeepa. Couldn't find your email address, so I'll explain the cilantro seed germination here.

    Main thing is that your seeds are viable. If you have harvested them fr/ previous plants, make sure they are fully dry, browned and falling off before you remove them. Soaking 2-3 days does help, but you can instead gently agitate the seeds with a spoon between damp paper towels to breach the hard shell.
    Sow them only 1/4 inch deep in very soft, friable soil; barely cover the seeds. Keep them moist while you wait. Germination is 7-10 days. If you want a steady supply of leaves, you can stagger the planting every 3 weeks for crop overlap as the older plants start to bolt (put up flowers/seeds, no further culinary leaf production).

    Cilantro is erratic. Supposedly, they do not transplant well b/c of their long tap root. Ours thrived wildly. If you continue to have problems, I would suggest young plants fr/ a garden center, carefully transplanted. Hope this helps.

    Thanks for explaining the distinction b/t dhoka and dhokla. I'd like them both. : )

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  30. Some day I too will thank my hubby for waiting patiently while food gets photographed! But I'll have to wait and see what he's like with the nappies... very sweet post.

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  31. I was thinking, why do the pics look so familiar. That lebanese and the thai place is my hangout spot too, not to mention the movie theatres.

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  32. Hey...you busy..? hope you re in good spirits!
    Have a lovely day !
    Shn

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  33. sandeepa-di (di bollam...hope you don't mind). Aaj tomar recipe dekhe charchari banalam...daroon holo..purota ure gelo. Tomar darun recipe-gulor jonno anek anek thank you!

    Tumi kothay gele ? Bondhura chole jaote khub mon kharap ? Aamra, tomar blog bondhu-ra tomar kachche thakbo anek din :). Sending you positive thoughts.

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  34. Hi Sandeepa,

    Kothai tumi? Shob theek-thaak? Miss reading your posts - onek din holo notun post koroni

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  35. Still on break??!!!! Hope you are having a good time. :D

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  36. hey Sandeepa,
    miss reading ur posts...

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  37. Kahan hain aap :) how have you been doing!

    take care,
    musical.

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  38. Hey Buddy, Where are u, its been more than a week:) hope everything is fine with you guys. BTW finally I tried kohlrabi curry ur version. It's yummy we enjoyed with chapati's. I just made slight change accord to our taste. din'tget chance to take pic but next time when i make i will surely take pic and post it.

    Hope to see u soon. Hugs.

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  39. Hey EveryOne
    Sorry for the hiatus. Breaks are bad, they just make you long for more and make you lazy :) And summer does still bad things to blogging, you just want to hang out outside instead of at the comp
    Trying to come out of it soonnnnnn.

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  40. aha u lazy bum...take ur lappi with u when u r lazying in sunshine and post;) he he... have good time san. we in england r still praying for good sunshine

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